There is something of the marvelous in all things of nature.
I am hesitant to write this morning. I have been avoiding writing for days. I have been avoiding feeling for days. I have been so scared. At times, I have been overcome with anxiety. I have used the phrase, “holding on by a thread” more than I care to admit. My legs have been tingly and I have been on the edge of tears for days, yet never really crying. And I have also been absolutely amazed and humbled by our friend’s kindness and generosity and general “knowing”. Its really quite phenomenal. And so today, I am reminded that while there is so much I am not in control of right now, there are things that I can look to, or lean into that provide me much strength and grounding. The outdoors, nature, open space, hiking….it all nourishes me and holds me and provides so much to me that I know I can’t put into words. So today, I will hike. I will walk in the outdoors and feel the sun above me, the earth below me and the rocks and trees around me. And I will regroup and start afresh. Andrew goes into surgery one week from this very moment, and I trust that one week from today will begin the true healing and recovery that Andrew so deserves and has waited so patiently for.
i thank You God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes